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Psssst…Hey Shorty

It goes down in the DM! Isn’t that what they say?

I remember a few years ago, this man messaged me and although I knew none of what he was saying was true, I played along. He went from owning his own construction company to needing money to get a phone while stuck in another country. My reply was “nah.” I didn’t hesitate, didn’t sugarcoat it, just no. Didn’t explain why. Simply no. A few months later, I saw the same guy (we were friends on the social media app). He had changed his name and was now the father of two boys. When he told me about himself, he had a daughter. I may or may not have commented on the photo. I was blocked shortly thereafter.

Here is a conversation that was brought to my attention of a lovely lady who has a public profile. The names have been changed to protect the innocent and the not so innocent. For the sake of this feed, they will be referred to as Catfish (CF) and Pretty Lady (PL). Enjoy! I certainly chuckled quite a bit when reading.

CF: Hello my lady.

PL: Hello Catfish.

CF: Hey how are you doing today

PL: Terrible. You?

CF: Lol/ I’m good/I’m pleased to meet you. I’m (name redacted) and you

PL: What does my profile say?

CF: (name redacted)

PL: That’s my name. But I’m not really pleased to meet you.

CF: Lol ya funny

Why did you say that

PL: Because [inserts pictures of two separate profiles with the same person’s picture]

CF: ??

PL: You and someone are using the same fake picture (shrug emoji). Rather the same photos of someone else

CF: I don’t understand what the hell you are talking about?

PL: Go on and ask me for money for your sick relative.

My my…are you upset?

Is that a question or a statement?

CF: You getting me confused dear, I still don’t understand what you’re talking about. Do I look like a beggar to you??

I have to be upset cus I hate it when someone says sh**s about me or doubts my personality (Yes, dear reader, they really put an “s” on that word)

PL: Whoever you are is not the person in the photo.

No. You don’t look like a beggar. But that’s the point, isn’t it? You’re not the first man to slide in the DM under false pretenses. Also, please refrain from cursing when communicating with me. I’m not using profanity. I would like the same courtesy.

CF: You know what, I’m an upright man who believes in honesty and trust. I’m too seasoned for games because I’m a responsible person and a father but if you not comfortable talking to me you can block me and stop saying sh**s I don’t understand okay

PL: (Peace sign emoji) This conversation is over. Enjoy your day.

CF: Get the f*** off my dm

PL: Likewise.

CF: B**** a**

PL: Same

CF: I’m blocking you

PL: (Thumbs up emoji)

CF: Rn

PL: Bye

CF: Just get out you B****

PL: Blocking but still typing (insert thinking emoji followed by laughing emojis)

Shrugging emoji

Five laughing emojis

 CF: Responds with angry face emoji

PL: Three laughing emoji

CF: Your nothing but a butch a**

PL: Where’s the block?

CF: Hold

PL: What’s a butch a**?

CF: Imma block yu right away

I meant b**** a**

PL: I’m [going to] save you the trouble. Let me just block your ignorant behind. Cursing out a stranger on a stupid app.

The end.

Here’s the lesson: if you’re going to attempt to deceive someone via social media, don’t get upset when said person calls you out on it. Also: don’t take no wooden nickels. 😊 Like and love yourself enough to not be fooled by internet trolls who only tell you what you want to hear.

Until Next Time,



P.S. I still watch the television show Catfish and absolutely love it.


Published by inilyaspencer

Hello! First, I have to tell you this: I LOVE the smell of books! New books, old books, glossy-paged, picture filled books. I will open a book, hold it to my nose, close my eyes and slowly inhale. Okay, I'm so glad that I've gotten that off my chest. If that doesn't make you uncomfortable, then this blog is just for you. I enjoy writing and I often have to keep my imagination at bay as I meander through my 9-5. Please follow and feel free to share with your friends.

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